melatonin, fuzzy blankets, and infomercials

insomnia sucks.  everyone i've met that battles this would agree.  it's definitely not funny; but then again, neither was the show from comedian dave attell on comedy central with the themed title and ironic programming slot.  have you seen his latest show?  mom & dad, do NOT click on that link. interesting stuff, but you've gotta hoodwink directv into giving you showtime free (i'm not paying for this, right?)

shutting down my brain is a tough gig.  i'm up most nights with worry, wonder, and indigestion.  i ponder musical ideas, peer in on my kids as they sleep (creepy, eh?), think about death, rehash the family budget, rifle through online ads knowing full well i'll never buy anything, feel guilty about my practice routine (or lack thereof), pee a thousand times, stare out the front window and watch the world in its slumber.

one of the perks of my nightly battle is the opportunity to hear a bunch of new music.  not necessarily new, but shuffled and dealt to my headphones by my iTunes library.  listening to music is the best, and sometimes my hectic life doesn't clear out chunks of time for me to sit back and soak up interesting and different and often times wonderful music.  i've always got time for halloween, alaska or tyondai braxton but need to continue hipping my spirit to stuff from today and yesteryear.

the as-i'm-writing-and-editing-this playlist
* kronos quartet rachell's weepinge - early music
* nat king cole the late, late show
* erroll garner you're blase - body & soul
* the books we bought the flood - the way out
* tower of power what is hip? - soul vaccination
* spaghetti western string co. luna marinara - quiet mob
* orange then blue aline oro - hold the elevator
* marvin gaye i heard it through the grapevine 
* miles davis quintet well you needn't - steamin'
* louis armstrong blueberry hill 
* ralph alessi, michael caine, peter epstein egg - circa
* michael lowenstern 1985 - 1985
* the bad plus dirty blonde - give
* uri caine variation 18, canon at the 6th - the goldberg variations
* james taylor, yo yo ma, edgar meyer, mark o'connor hard times come again no more - appalachian journey
* george schuller's circle wide rotation - like before, somewhat after
* grant green & bobby hutcherson django - idle moments
* matthew shipp zx-1 - nu bop
* hank mobley chain reaction - straight, no filter
* the monteverdi choir fair and fair - britten's spring symphony
* antonio carlos jobim tema de amor de gabriela - the man from ipanema
* mel lewis jazz orchestra make me smile - featuring the music of bob brookmeyer
* bjork sun in my mouth - vespertine
* abbey lincoln conversation with a baby - wholly earth
* dave douglas catalyst - strange liberation
* mark anthony turn age cut up - blood on the floor
* pat metheny group montevideo - quartet
* elmo hope trio like someone in love - the master takes
* paul motian trio one in three - 2000 & one

my weapon of choice

my back will tighten up today while i sit in the bleachers at yet another weekend basketball tournament.  i'll feel like eating comfort food at odd hours.  my eyelids will weigh a ton.  i'll oscillate between punch drunk happiness and mild apathy.  and in the wee small hours of the morning,
my brain will sure as shootin' be firing on all cylinders.

you're thinking "hey man. you posted this in the middle of the day. that doesn't count as insomnia, silly." folks - i'm no sucker.  successful writing is a combination of creative thought and correct grammar.  proofreading at 3:44 a.m. with fuzzy eyesight, a contorted position on the couch, and hallucinating weariness is not a healthy combo for giving myself the stamp of approval that would pass mr. lippold's blood red grading sickle back in english class. he wouldn't go for my liberal use of parenthesis and no capital letters.